my mom used to meddle in my life, she still does in truth, that's why, althought i live not far in the same town, i don't go at her's often
ok your mum its different, maybe its because she just want to protect you? Mine is not like this i speak about other people who enter in your life and mingle of all
But sometimes parents meddle into your life without you've asked them I think you have to make your own mistakes, but if you ask them for help then they're helping you
Last Edit: Jul 15, 2013 20:03:01 GMT 1 by silversand
I walk wondering why, the same dream so many times
But sometimes parents meddle in your life without you've asked them I think you have to make your own mistakes, but if you aks them for help then they're helping you
mine parents always meddle. they always tells me what I should be doing. it´s stressful. I have tried to explain that I cannot take care of everything at once, and I need to prioritize my problems. but I don´t think they really get it. my dad really wants to understand my situations, but he simply cannot, unfortunately.
Last Edit: Jul 14, 2013 23:36:22 GMT 1 by misswill0w
The world is neither fair nor unfair - It's just us trying to feel that there's some sense in it
Agreed!! Sometimes, people do it with the best of intentions, buuuut ... most of us here are adult enough to make our own decisions (and mistakes!), yes? And while it's never a bad idea to listen to an outside opinion, to be constantly treated like you need steering through life because (in this other person's opinion) you can't be trusted to tie your shoelaces up on your own ... THEN it gets irritating.
Case in point: I need a new car, as you all know. My beloved Focus has gotten old and a bit senile and has for the past year at least, been trying to kill me (like the time when it lost control and spun off a roundabout... or when it now, dies completely while moving. It doesn't stall, it simply shuts down!! Which is 'fun' on a motorway...)
So my choices are:
A. Buy a car privately (me) B. Buy a commercial vehicle through my Limited Company (also me)
Because I am having a LOT of work done on my flat (new electrics, new kitchen, new bathroom, new central heating, new carpet) I cannot afford to buy a car privately.
But I can afford to buy a van through my company: there are a lot of tax perks that I can get if I buy a vehicle that way. Yes, I will have to pay tax myself for non-business use of the vehicle because it then becomes an 'employee perk', but considering that the vehicle will be used to get to and from work, lugging location film kit around, transporting things here and there AND the company will pay for MOT, road tax, servicing, etc. it makes a whole heap of sense to NOT buy a car privately.
If we go on a location shoot, my elderly Focus can't cope: after we've stuffed in lights, tripods, cameras, my sound kit, laptops, hard drives, rigs, etc, etc, in the boot, on the back seats, my poor car (it's a saloon variant) sits back on it's rear axle and groans all the way!! So a little van makes sense: it looks like a car, but it has a GINORMOUS boot.
The biggest problem is that a Fiesta van has no back seats. So yes, I can't carry friends around, but the vast majority if the time, my Focus' back seats are unused!! And if The Girls want a day trip down to Brighton, I'll hire a bloody car. Simples.
Yes, I could buy a traditional four seater car as a company vehicle, but HMRC (Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs) make you jump through a million and one hoops and itemise every. single. non-business mile you use for a car, but for a van, you can just pay a basic tax rate for personal use.
(There's a whole heap of other perks, but that's boring accountant-y stuff.) (Sorry GothMaz, but I simply can't find accounting in any way thrilling!! Hee!!)
Now (after all that!!) while most of my pals and my accountant and and my Mum (most important!) and and the rest of my family and my clients can see the good sense in that, one of my best friends has ganged up with my ex-business partner (whom I adore and still work with) because they have the idea stuck in their head that this is just another one of 'Linda's Mad Ideas' and that they need to hold my hand, steer me away from the lovely, little van and make me buy a Grown Up car ... and put myself into shedloads of debt for the next four years...
Honestly, those two always do this to me: when I was looking to buy a flat, I wasn't allowed to go look at property by myself in case I did something stupid, so the one time I went to look at a flat on my own and bought it, the two of them went NUTS at me: "What have you done? Oh my god, why didn't you wait for one of us to come with you?", etc, etc, etc.
And then they raced round to see it.
And then they saw how cute and suitable it was.*
And what a Good Idea it was that I bought it.
And how glad they were that they had steered me to the right choice (!!!)
*facepalm*
They mean well, but DAMN!!, I wish they'd trust me to make my own decisions in peace!! I don't need to seek their approval on something as simple as a car, FFS, if I don't get along with a van ... I simply sell the damned thing!!
Aaaaargh!!
* Cheap and in one of the most sought-after areas in the county, but the size of a shoebox and in need of serious modernising. Ye gods, if you could have seen it when I moved in, you'd understand why it was for sale at an absolute flippin' pittance!! Seriously. There is no WAY I could afford to buy a place like this, in this area, if it wasn't a run down shell. Phweeee!! The woman who lived here before me was either colour blind or deranged possibly both. The colour scheme was DISGUSTING (and she'd only repainted as high as she could reach!!) and the kitchen and bathroom were cheap late '70's, early '80's bottom-of-the-range style (if you could call it that: 'style' implies at least SOME sort of taste/cohesion!!)
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
B13 it´s sounds like you are trying to justifie to buy the van. who are you trying to convince?, Yourself?, others?
is the doubt just because it is not the "normal" thing to do?
the "normal" choice is not always the best, it´s just the choice that makes you FEEL "safest", and if things turn out to be a bad idea, you dont have to justify it, cause that what everyone would have done.
ask your stomach, it will know what to do.....
Last Edit: Jul 15, 2013 6:56:51 GMT 1 by misswill0w
The world is neither fair nor unfair - It's just us trying to feel that there's some sense in it
B13 it´s sounds like you are trying to justifie to buy the van. who are you trying to convince?, Yourself?, others?
In a way, you're right.
A normal, privately bought car WOULD be preferable. Absolutely. But I simply can't afford it right now. Next year or the year after, I could. But right now, I'm so far down the renovation route in my flat that I can't stop shelling out £££s to do it up (I have no electricity in the kitchen and no hot water apart from the kettle and the shower, for example.)
My car is only going to last another month or so at best and I CANNOT risk a breakdown in Winter. With Raynauds Disease, I'd probably die within an hour. No joke, my circulation will simply 'crap out'.
So I HAVE to buy a vehicle through my company and the most cost-efficient way to do that is to buy a little van.
So yes, you're right: I shouldn't have to justify my decision to anyone else if my stomach is telling me that the ONLY decision I can make now is MY one.
Yes, I'd love a new Hyundai i30 or a Skoda Rapid, buuuuuuut ... current situation dictates otherwise.
...
And in all honesty, I actually like the idea of zipping around in a top-of-the-range sports van!!
This is the one that I am looking at:
(Oh, and my bike will fit better in the back of a van. This is very important. (Hee!!) While I can get the damned thing into the Focus, I have to take it apart - with the van, it'll simply slide in AND I can tie it down properly.)
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Linda it sounds like you're trying to convince yourself about this decision. It looks great, it works for you just DO IT!! Trust your own judgement, you know best what you need. x
Are 'station wagons' what we Brits call 'estate cars'?
I think they might fall under the same category as 'normal' cars as far as HMRC is concerned (they have a list of approved vehicles, most (if not all) of which are two-seater vans)
...and I'm personally not overly keen on the look of estate cars. But good suggestion none-the-less!!
...and I am trying not to sing "ambition in the back of a black car" the whole time.
(Like I need an excuse to hum Cure tunes!! Hee!!)
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.