For those of us who share an interest in astrology

I’m esoteric but I’m not an astrologer.

I'm a big fan of the moon in case you didn't notice.

Hang on a minute. How long have there been 12 planets?
Ever since Pluto was downgraded, I count only 8.

Astrologically speaking, 12 "planets".
Sun, Moon, Mercury. Mars, Venus, Saturn, Jupiter, Neptune, Pluto and the "rising sign" which is not really a planet but has a similiar function in someone´s chart so I count that one in. Plus, there are two minor "planets," like pluto, which are called Chiron and Lilith and which most astrologers count on, too 

Okay, I see the count there, but the sun & the moon aren't planets.
The sun is a star & the moon is a satellite. That's not an opinion either. It's scientific fact.
Pluto would scrape by as a planet, but people in silly suits have told the world it isn't.
I'm genuinely curious, as a non-believer in astrology, how this is supposed to work.

Oh! Well, since I´m not Robert Smith, I don´t know much about astronomy. But as the planets whirl around the sun, they cross the various star signs.
The velocity in which they do so depends very much on the planet, though. For example, Pluto takes a few decades to pass one sign, wheareas the moon enters a new sign every two days or so.
And there are pages like astro.cafeastrology.com/natal.php
or   alabe.com/freechart/default.asp or  horoscopes.astro-seek.com/birth-chart-horoscope-online where as you enter a certain point of time, you get a chart and a list of the positions of the planets at just that time, for free, of course. There is also a quick explanation for what everything means. 

In the chart above, the symbols just around the circle represent the planets. The symbols internal of the circle represent the star signs, and the numbers that divide the cirlce into 12 parts are the houses. 
I know, complicated, right? ...