I checked my public library's card catalog the other day and I think I'm going to put in a request for Cured. I think it will be a quick read and a lot of people seem to have a favorable opinion of it. On the other hand, the same thing can be said of Danielle Steele.
Since that unpleasant "court business" I have to admit I've had a bit of a chip on my shoulder about Mr. T, which is stupid. We all make mistakes, and from what I understand, drink played a large part. I do remember seeing the Reflections tour how incredibly happy he seemed to be to be up there.
I won't say anything about the whole, "maybe not a great musician" thing, because he seems like a genuinely decent guy.
Making good on my word, I borrowed a copy from the library to take to the beach.
I am enjoying reading this. I do think Lol has a good heart and this book provides some interesting insights into the early days of the band (I'm only up to Seventeen Seconds).
I'm intrigued about his motivation for writing this. I'm especially interested to read how his substance abuse ultimately contributed to his being ousted from the band, as well how he was able to turn things around for himself. It's particularly heartbreaking for me to read about someone who had such a cold childhood, devoid of nurturing and support in many ways (at least from his father and his mother probably had a difficult time of it in that regard, too). That will certainly set most people up for some real bumps to overcome in life.
Clearly, Lol is intelligent and has a good sense of humor. Looking forward to finishing this. I think I haven't given him the benefit of the doubt up until now. It's nice to have your mind changed about someone. Who among us is without faults?
I just finished the last couple of pages this morning and posted the following review on Goodreads:
Although I am a highly distractable reader I devoured this because it was "high interest" to me. I borrowed this book from the library, but having read it, I may have to buy a copy to add to my collection of items related to The Cure as I'm pretty sure I'll want to revisit it some day.
The Cure has been my favorite band for about 30 years. I simply don't feel the same about any other band. None other feels so familiar and resonates in the same way for me. It's like they managed to tap into something in my brain that has just always felt like "home" from a young age.
Admittedly, before reading this book, I had dismissed Lol Tolhurst because of what I knew of the lawsuit and some of the alcohol-fueled antics he displayed while still playing with the band (not exactly a great tool for integrity and performance in any kind of career). I have only seen him perform on one tour with The Cure - The Reflections shows in NYC in 2011. He looked so supremely happy up there; I noticed how he was beaming onstage and looked to relish taking it all in. This image was difficult to reconcile with the image I had of him as a trouble making, adolescent jester, as unfair of me as that was.
Being a parent and the product of a pretty darn unhealthy home environment until leaving for college, Lol's account of his childhood was particularly heartbreaking for me. He was likely more prone to alcoholism due to a genetic predisposition from his father, but certainly it would have been very difficult to emerge from such a cold home like intact. It's pretty clear now why things turned out the way they did for him for so much of his adult life. That's an uphill battle. Add to the mix success in the music industry at such a young age and there is a recipe for discontent and self destructive behavior.
I'm only happy that Lol mustered the strength and resolve to strip everything away and find what matters. It's so hard to reprogram oneself in that way. It takes a ton of energy and work. I find it amusing the final push came in the desert, the most desolate of places. Having lived in the desert for five years I can definitely see how that would be the place to discard all illusions and pretenses about one's life. Not exactly glamorous, but it is the relative absence of all else that can make it possible there, I guess.
I had a difficult time understanding Lol's motivation to write this book before I finished it, and I second guessed Robert Smith's approval of the project. But now I can see the value of this book not only for the author, but for others who may not understand why they are, perhaps, stuck in patterns in their own lives from which they can't seem to break free. A self help book for hardcore fans of The Cure, perhaps?
I wish Lol well in his endeavors because I now truly believe he is a good person who is living his life not only in a way that is authentic but also in a way in which he values himself. That certainly helped draw him to his wife and be a better parent to his son. Breaking destructive family patterns ingrained in us is truly a help to humanity.
I just finished the last couple of pages this morning and posted the following review on Goodreads:
Although I am a highly distractable reader I devoured this because it was "high interest" to me. I borrowed this book from the library, but having read it, I may have to buy a copy to add to my collection of items related to The Cure as I'm pretty sure I'll want to revisit it some day.
The Cure has been my favorite band for about 30 years. I simply don't feel the same about any other band. None other feels so familiar and resonates in the same way for me. It's like they managed to tap into something in my brain that has just always felt like "home" from a young age.
Admittedly, before reading this book, I had dismissed Lol Tolhurst because of what I knew of the lawsuit and some of the alcohol-fueled antics he displayed while still playing with the band (not exactly a great tool for integrity and performance in any kind of career). I have only seen him perform on one tour with The Cure - The Reflections shows in NYC in 2011. He looked so supremely happy up there; I noticed how he was beaming onstage and looked to relish taking it all in. This image was difficult to reconcile with the image I had of him as a trouble making, adolescent jester, as unfair of me as that was.
Being a parent and the product of a pretty darn unhealthy home environment until leaving for college, Lol's account of his childhood was particularly heartbreaking for me. He was likely more prone to alcoholism due to a genetic predisposition from his father, but certainly it would have been very difficult to emerge from such a cold home like intact. It's pretty clear now why things turned out the way they did for him for so much of his adult life. That's an uphill battle. Add to the mix success in the music industry at such a young age and there is a recipe for discontent and self destructive behavior.
I'm only happy that Lol mustered the strength and resolve to strip everything away and find what matters. It's so hard to reprogram oneself in that way. It takes a ton of energy and work. I find it amusing the final push came in the desert, the most desolate of places. Having lived in the desert for five years I can definitely see how that would be the place to discard all illusions and pretenses about one's life. Not exactly glamorous, but it is the relative absence of all else that can make it possible there, I guess.
I had a difficult time understanding Lol's motivation to write this book before I finished it, and I second guessed Robert Smith's approval of the project. But now I can see the value of this book not only for the author, but for others who may not understand why they are, perhaps, stuck in patterns in their own lives from which they can't seem to break free. A self help book for hardcore fans of The Cure, perhaps?
I wish Lol well in his endeavors because I now truly believe he is a good person who is living his life not only in a way that is authentic but also in a way in which he values himself. That certainly helped draw him to his wife and be a better parent to his son. Breaking destructive family patterns ingrained in us is truly a help to humanity.
Great review - I just always think about how so many people had that kind of emotionally unavailable parent in that context - due to the impact of ww2. I can see it in my own family.
I just finished the last couple of pages this morning and posted the following review on Goodreads:
Great review - I just always think about how so many people had that kind of emotionally unavailable parent in that context - due to the impact of ww2. I can see it in my own family.
Yes, that is true. You can't possibly come back from an experience like that without some issues to work through.
Why some people choose to become parents in the first place, though, is just lost on me. It's not like it's compulsory... Very unfair.
Great review - I just always think about how so many people had that kind of emotionally unavailable parent in that context - due to the impact of ww2. I can see it in my own family.
Yes, that is true. You can't possibly come back from an experience like that without some issues to work through.
Why some people choose to become parents in the first place, though, is just lost on me. It's not like it's compulsory... Very unfair.
Pipperoo
Big Hand
Songs Of A Lost World Moon Moderator
I have had come dm conversations with him on Twitter about poetry and songwriting. He was incredibly insightful and intelligent.
Glad to hear it. Not surprised there, either.
That’s one of the things, I think, that draws me to TC so much: they’re an intelligent band. I think in order for that to be true as such a broad statement about them, pretty much everyone involved has to have a certain amount of depth.
I have had come dm conversations with him on Twitter about poetry and songwriting. He was incredibly insightful and intelligent.
Glad to hear it. Not surprised there, either.
That’s one of the things, I think, that draws me to TC so much: they’re an intelligent band. I think in order for that to be true as such a broad statement about them, pretty much everyone involved has to have a certain amount of depth.
